Near the start of this year, I made a new year’s resolution to start putting up my own content once weekly. It was all good for about a month until my spurt of creative writing ran out, and life threw unexpected hitches for me to deal with. In a span of six months, I have dealt with health issues twice, the most recent one of which landed me a head injury of which I just recovered sufficiently in time for me to function properly and to continue university.
I have also recently come to a dawning that God has placed certain situations and circumstances in my life which I thought I would only be dealing with 10 years later… Not right now. In the words of S1Ep1 of Orange Is the New Black, the episode title “I’m Not Ready” sums up the current dawning, which I choose to see through the eyes of humour, since there’s nothing I can do about it.
How coincidental is it that your God-given talents in writing, people’s general response to that- or rather, one particular piece of work, and one or two aspects of your own personal life would converge like three cars approaching each other at a road intersection? To people who only know me on a surface level, it will seem like I’m unnecessarily hung up on past events, but I truly beg to differ. I’m dealing with issues on a accelerated timeline, and this is what’s bizarre to me.
Perhaps I can’t think up blog content right now because I’ve got more significant fish to fry, so to speak. Even before I started university, I was working on two scripts at the same time, all in good faith that someday the world will see the fictional worlds I created out in action. The scripts are something that are very fulfilling to me, as they are platforms to discuss real life issues that may be too touchy to do so via traditional journalism, for example.
All this, probably, is why I fell back to not updating on the regular. Another truth I uncovered about me as a blogger is that I’m more motivated by the likes or comments I get more than anything else. Which to be truthful, is as vapid as getting ego boosts through adoration on social media.
It’s time for me to set a new agenda for blogging. Merely updating regularly as a means to an end is apparently not enough.